A person drowning in life's problems may think that a single psychological consultation with a psychiatrist will rid them of every problem. A woman standing on the brink of divorce may believe that she can rebuild her marital home and restore it to its finest state by attending psychotherapy alone several times. A family may bring us a son steeped in crime and delinquency, hoping to change his nature once and for all. An unhappy young man may assume that we will prescribe "happiness pills" to free him from his misery, while another who does not work hard at his studies may expect us to prescribe "concentration pills" so he can succeed without effort.

Unfortunately, neither we nor anyone else possesses Aladdin's lamp or a magic wand that can reverse circumstances, erase psychological problems, and bring happiness and contentment with a single motion. But we believe that solutions are possible, that change for the better is not impossible, and that perseverance with psychotherapy can sometimes produce results that seem like magic. We do not entice people with false promises like those made in some advertisements for weight-loss products and cosmetics. We do know, however, that explaining and understanding the origins of psychological symptoms, carrying out cognitive, behavioral, and other therapeutic interventions, and working intensively and repeatedly with the family when necessary will create substantial and lasting change in people's lives.

Getting to know and understand oneself, developing healthier and more flexible awareness and responses to stressful surrounding circumstances, navigating relationships safely and appropriately by either repairing or leaving them, and overcoming life's problems without collapsing or regressing all require many continuous steps and close follow-up. We will often not obtain immediate results, but we continue the therapeutic work with a conviction resembling the care of a plant beginning with a seed: you must continue watering and tending it even when you cannot see the results with your own eyes for several weeks, trusting that you will eventually glimpse a green stem breaking through the soil and announcing new life.

A person receiving treatment may hope that their psychiatrist will listen to everything in the first meeting, immediately provide fundamental solutions, and make that first meeting the last. However, rigorous psychiatric research indicates that improvement depends, among many factors, on the number of times the person sees their treating clinician. We cannot grasp all of a person's symptoms, traits, circumstances, and relationships in a single meeting. Instead, we gather several "pictures" across multiple meetings and then assemble that "puzzle," which allows us to see the roadmap for the therapeutic work together.

We do not have pills for success or happiness. We have pills for mental disorders that may stand in the way of our pursuit of success and happiness, and that does not exempt us from working toward change. These principles should be established from the beginning of the therapeutic process. Those seeking psychotherapy should know that slow, gradual, cumulative change is what can be relied upon, while "magical" changes—meaning immediate and dramatic ones—are neither credible nor lasting. Real change comes from within, not from outside, and the therapist's role goes no further than interpreting, facilitating, and supporting the process of change. Psychotherapy is not a leisurely outing; those seeking it must make an effort, invest time, and train themselves consistently to move their lives toward something better.


Download the Tatmeen app for online psychological and family consultations from the Apple App Store or Google Play. Also register on the Tatmeen mental health website to access valuable information and practical tools for strengthening your mental and family well-being.