Where Do Negative Thoughts Come From?

Pessimism, frustration, despair, feeling defeated, sadness, and loss are feelings that arise from negative thinking, which each of us inevitably experiences in one form or another. Sometimes, experiencing these feelings can be beneficial and healthy when they affect us to a reasonable degree, as this can strengthen a person’s psychological resilience and make them stronger, wiser, more insightful, and more mature. The problem arises when this negative thinking occupies a large part of a person’s mind and consumes so much of their time that it prevents them from living normally and healthily.

These feelings certainly differ in how they are expressed, the symptoms they produce, and how they affect and are affected by a person’s behavior and actions. However, they share the fact that a person experiencing them is described as having a negative thinking style. If a person’s way of thinking is maladaptive and dominated by negativity, it will lead not only to pessimism, bleakness, and sadness, but also to several psychological disorders, such asdepression, anxiety, and obsessive thoughts. In other cases, the presence of these psychological disorders may give rise to such feelings and negative thoughts. Accordingly, and given the importance of avoiding a negative thinking style, Tatmeen presents this article to answer several questions about negative thinking, including: Where do negative thoughts come from? Is negative thinking a mental illness? How can you get rid of negative thinking?

Where do negative thoughts come from?

Negative thoughts have many causes, including:

1. Indecision.

What makes a person indecisive is fear of the unknown: the fear of making any decision or taking any step simply because they do not know what its consequences will be. For some people, the unknown does not usually represent anything positive; instead, it leaves them anticipating and fearing what will happen, which drives them to think negatively. All you need to do is not be afraid to make a decision, even if it turns out to be wrong. Never be afraid to try, even when you do not know the outcome. Even if it results in a loss, that is all right, because without it you will not learn the appropriate lesson. Trying should therefore be your only option.

2. Unconscious and excessive generalization.

Many of us go through professional, romantic, and social experiences that are toxic or unhealthy. However, one bad professional experience certainly does not mean that every workplace is bad. Nor does dealing with someone who ultimately proved to be a bad person mean that everyone around us is bad. Unconsciously and excessively generalizing from a particular experience can create a negative thinking pattern that makes a person view every new experience as certain to be like the one before it.

3. Absolute thinking, or all-or-nothing thinking.

This pattern is usually called black-and-white thinking. It involves judging and viewing matters from only one perspective without considering other possible angles or accounts. This style of thinking generates negative thoughts.

4. Parenting that belittles the child.

A style of parenting that prevents a child from making mistakes and treats them harshly when they do can make the child feel less worthy and capable than those around them. This also includes calling the child undesirable and demeaning names, such as stupid, fat, or a failure. This belittling parenting style can create a negative pattern in how the child views the people and events around them.

Is negative thinking a mental illness?

Negative thinking is not, in itself, a mental illness. However, a lifestyle dominated by negative thinking can cause several psychological disorders, foremost among themobsessive-compulsive disorder, depression, and anxiety.

Negative thinking may be considered a cause of several psychological disorders because it exhausts the mind and wastes time and effort on imagining the worst possible outcomes or looking only at the dark side of everything. This is unlike positive thinking, which helps you see the brighter side of matters and enjoy psychological balance and a calm life. It is therefore important to work on moving away from negative thinking and transforming it into a positive pattern.

How can you get rid of negative thinking?

1. Stop blaming yourself.

Remember that mistakes, however serious or impossible to undo, are a natural part of life. None of us is perfect or free from flaws and mistakes. You should therefore reduce your self-blame and avoid being harsh with yourself, as this will hinder your ability to think healthily and find solutions to mistakes.

2. Be able to identify the source of your negative thinking.

You will not be able to confront negative thoughts and eliminate them at their root without identifying the source from which they arise. Whether that source is an event or a person, do not allow it to determine how you think. Whatever the source and impact of these negative thoughts, always make sure to reassess the matter yourself.

3. Learn to say no, and do not hesitate to express it.

Not every idea or person around you is right for you, so you need to realize that you always have the right to reject what you do not want. You have the ability and freedom to decide what you want. You do not have to accept things you do not want or may be unable to do. Your energy has limits, and you should not exceed them simply to please others.

4. Practice your favorite hobby.

Hobbies provide another outlet for expressing and releasing what we feel. Practicing a hobby can help us express what lies within us more than we may realize, while releasing the negative feelings and thoughts that overwhelm us. We therefore recommend either finding a hobby or developing one you already have. You will then realize its importance.

5. Listen to music you enjoy and love.

It is said that music is food for the soul and can achieve the same results as psychotherapy sessions. You should therefore listen to music you enjoy, which lifts your spirits and helps you feel better. There is nothing wrong with singing along, and it does not matter if you do not have a melodious voice. What matters is that you feel happy and relieved.

6. Exercise and practice meditation.

You need to understand that the kind of lifestyle you lead plays a major role in shaping the feelings that stay with you. Make sure to exercise and practice meditation regularly, and do not underestimate their importance, as they can free you from the negative thoughts and feelings you experience. Moreover, they can increase your capacity for achievement and strengthen your positive feelings.

7. Remove toxic people from your life and keep those who care about you.

Choose the people around you carefully because they play a central role in shaping your system of thoughts and the way you feel about what happens to you. If something is upsetting you, speak with people who care about you. They are the ones who will offer advice and help you overcome the difficult circumstances you are facing. At the same time, distance yourself from toxic and negative people who thrive on seeing you drained and unsuccessful, or who make you feel worthless and not good enough. Do not give them the privilege of being part of your life.

8. Set clear boundaries with those around you.

You need to be able to set clear boundaries with the people around you when dealing with them, and not allow anyone to violate or overstep them. Express your discomfort immediately, and do not offer endless justifications for what bothers you. It is enough that it causes you negative thoughts and feelings.

9. Set aside time for yourself, and do not exhaust yourself with work.

Avoid overworking, as it can not only generate negative thoughts but also bring you to the point of burnout. If you want to take a break, do not be ashamed of doing so. Recognize that you owe it to yourself and that you will be unable to achieve or accomplish anything if you experience a health problem.

10. Pay attention to your body movements, as they express what is inside you.

Pay attention to your body to identify what you are feeling. If you are constantly lethargic and frowning, try to stop and replace these behaviors with smiling and activity. These details may be small, but they can make a major difference.

Many factors may lie behind the negative thinking and feelings a person experiences, which can, in turn, drive certain behaviors that further reinforce and sustain this thinking. Someone who reaches the absolute conclusion that they are a failure because they did not accomplish certain things will certainly not experience positive feelings such as self-confidence, competence, and achievement. Consequently, they will lack the motivation and enthusiasm to try and pursue success again.

Someone who has gone through painful and harmful experiences and relationships with others may develop negative thoughts and generalize their judgments to everyone. They may also feel bad if they enter any relationship with another person. The feelings arising from these thoughts may push them toward isolation, giving them a false sense of satisfaction and calm, or bring them into conflict with others, producing even more negative feelings. Ultimately, this will appear to confirm the false beliefs and ideas they had previously formed.

All of us want to be happy in life, yet no life is perfectly happy or entirely free from distress. In every circumstance, to live life as well as possible, we must pay attention to how we think and safeguard ourselves through moderation, because moderation in everything lies at the heart of the matter.

To learn more about negative thinking, download the mental health app from Tatmeen on Google Play and the App Store, and register on the Tatmeen website to access valuable information and practical tools for strengthening your mental health.