Each of us knows our own rhythms and emotional state, whether we feel relaxed or upset.

There are some feelings we might call easy feelings, such as happiness, fun, and cheerfulness, and it is naturally easy to deal with them. For example, when we feel happy, playful, and cheerful, it is easy to begin talking about different subjects because our minds and bodies are at ease and our mood is at its best.

The problem certainly does not lie in these easy feelings, but in another kind of feeling that arises when we are not comfortable or at our best, especially when we feel tired or hungry.

Reactions, behavior, communication, and ways of interacting may vary from one person to another when they feel hungry or tired. Some people can go for several hours without food or rest and continue communicating with those around them in a healthy, constructive way. Others need us to give them their own space when they feel hungry or tired. These people need enough time to eat, get some rest, and restore their energy before we begin talking with them.

When hunger or fatigue becomes intense, it can turn into heightened irritability. At that moment, we may say or do many inappropriate and upsetting things that we later regret.

Read also about marital discussions.

So promise yourselves and your life partners that you will postpone any difficult discussion when either of you feels tired or hungry. Most importantly, be clear and tell the other person when you do not feel well. For example: “I currently feel tired or hungry, and I am not in the best mood.... I need some rest or something to eat so I can talk to you when I have my full energy.”

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